Social Anxiety Forums

Konch00 · Terrified Newbie Joined: 01 Jul 2007 Posts: 6

I dont know if I am overexaggerating this or just have a poor memmory, but I honestly believe I have never participated in a full give-and-take conversation with anyone. Not with my parents, not my siblings, not my friends, or anyone.

I mean sure, I can small talk and @#%$ with some people, but thats the extent of it. All that ever happens is either we exanges nicetys for a few minutes and then nothing, or the other person is doing the bulk of the talking and I am just sitting there throwing in a stupid comment when there is a pause, then mulling over what an idiot thing to say it was. I'm not sure if this is just me having SA, or if there is another deep seeded issue at hand, but its almost like my brain is not fully functioning when I am around other people. This is really getting to me, as I am not really close to anyone in my life. If anyone else has any similar expieriences, I would love to hear about them. Thanks

Bobby · Calm Regular Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 57

lol this is probably the same with me too. Usually when there's a lull in convo all I'm thinking about is "What should I say next?"

However, how would you define a "full" conversation? Maybe everyone else has this problem.

Bravetailor · Calm Regular Joined: 18 Mar 2008 Posts: 55

I used to be able to handle this, back in high school. Over the years I've become much more conscious of not offending people, so I've often held back opinions and thoughts that could be touchy. On the other hand, I think I've held back myself as well.

A good conversation doesn't require much thought. I remember, in the past, a good give and take almost pretty much runs itself. You lose yourself in the conversation and you don't think about what you say to keep it going.

It's been a long time since I had that. I still have it with some family members, but it's not always the same as when you have it with a stranger or a friend.

Bobby · Calm Regular Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 57

Ah yes I know what you mean now. You can tell that a conversation isn't going well if you find yourself thinking about what to say next. It should all be natural and just flowing out without effort. You can only have a convo like that with someone you're comfortable with.

steve2007 · Terrified Newbie Joined: 09 Apr 2008 Posts: 2

hi i sufferd from social anxiety and now im cured my reason was because i didnt know the normal way of thinking. so if you think you dont know then let me know .

Bobby · Calm Regular Joined: 17 Feb 2007 Posts: 57

Why don't you post it here? It will help not only the people participating in the thread, but also the guests who might be reading this thread.